dreams

dreams suck.
last night, for the first time in like ever, I dreamed.
and it’s got me so shaken, I’ve been crying for almost an hour.
because, in this dream, everything was perfect.
I kissed you, and you kissed back.
and that was the dream.
the reason why I’m so fucking shaken is because you kissed back.
and now my heart hurts, because I know it will never happen.
you’re never going to feel the same way about me.
and I just have to deal with that, I guess.
but I hate it.
I hate that, even though I can tell you everything, and hugs are as natural as breathing between us, you’re never going to feel the same, no matter what I do.
and I hate myself for even saying that, because I know it hurts you as much as it hurts me.
I can’t leave you, because I love you too much to hurt you like that, but being around you hurts me just the same.
I’m stuck. </3